Taking Up Writing as an Old Man

In my seventy years I have played many roles: an obedient son, a good student, a hardworking employee, a reasonably successful businessman and in last few years an investor and a part time author. Through every one of these stages, private aspect of my personality was stable. I put my family’s interests above all else; respected, loved, nurtured and supported family members in achieving their goals. In return I got love and respect of my parents, brothers, their families, my wife, daughters and granddaughters.

My public persona developed during my progress to each successive stage. As a student, in school, college and postgraduate years, I focused on learning and resembled a sponge, ready to absorb whatever I came in contact with. As an employee in a large corporation I retained the absorbing qualities while also giving out some of what I had received over the years. One difference with the sponge was that generally the knowledge was voluntarily dispensed as and when necessary without it having to be squeezed out of me. I learnt early that the timely utilization of academic and practical learning combined with an urge to be useful brought salary increases and promotions.

As a businessman I assumed a broader personality. New factors came into consideration: appearance had to be more appealing to prospective customers, product had to be an improvement on what was available on the market, staff I hired had to be the right kind and needed appropriate treatment for best results. Every human has different needs and responds to different pressures. A successful businessman recognizes these needs and applies the right pressures, as and when needed, for best results.

The personality traits of an investor appear to be different but only superficially so. I had learnt to interact for mutual benefit with very divergent personalities with different strengths and weaknesses. As an investor I learnt that the companies have personalities just like individuals and have to satisfy same two criteria as the employees, one must be comfortable with the business they are in (personality) and they must have the ability to use their assets to the best advantage (competence). Thanks to my past experience I was able to apply these criteria and became a successful investor in a short order.

As an author I needed bits of all the traits that helped in my professional careers. Enough had happened to me, and I had seen even more happen to others, which would make several volumes of short stories and a few novels. I had given enough serious consideration to various aspects of human existence to justify another volume of essays. Over the years I had published a number of technical papers in international journals, so I knew I could write reasonably well. To sharpen my pencil I attended two courses in Creative Writing. I wrote and circulated a few stories to my friends and received hearty compliments. Thus encouraged, I sent them to various magazines. This is when I needed the tough edge my personality had acquired during the years when I was repeatedly turned down by prospective customers. They called back with negative response only once in a while; publishers never do. It did not take me long to fathom why some editors accept electronic transmissions. It is much easier to press the delete button than to live with the guilt of being a party to so much wasted paper. The insensitive ones, by far the majority, set up rigid guidelines for submissions on the best quality paper and then consign most of them to a handily placed waste basket after reading a couple of lines. The good in this process comes from the editors/publishers hiring students in creative writing courses as assistants whose main job is to empty the baskets into recycling bins at regular intervals.

Why do I continue to write when there is so little encouragement? It is my innate sense that I have something interesting to say coupled with the tough edge I developed while dealing with resistant customers. But more than anything else, there is Barb who taught the second Creative Writing course I participated in. She took me under her wings and has been a constant source of encouragement. Finally, I do not need to make a living from my writing. Therefore, it is not critical to my existence for my work to be accepted although, admittedly, frequent acceptance will boost my ego. There is a danger that if I ever became a sought after author the vanity may make me even more difficult to live with. But so far, writing has been a humbling, though not yet humiliating, experience.

My literary publications are a few serious essays and a collection of humorous short stories. The essays were well received but the book failed to attract the notice of reviewers and sales were largely limited to friends. I think I know where the problem may lie. My essays are serious but humourless affairs and my stories are funny but with nothing of any importance to tell. Somehow I have to add wit to my essays and make my stories more meaningful by interspersing them with serious comments like Somerset Maugham does in The Moon and Six Pence. That needs a new trait, I will work on it.

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